Saturday, January 3, 2009

What I Want

By now my readers have gathered from my title and description that I am an unmarried housewife. But what would it take to make this girl into a married housewife? Guys take note for I will be talking about my standards. Who knows, maybe you can bring this knowledge home to bag yourself your own unmarried housewife!

If you match this picture you win!

Step One: Have a great personality.

Yes, I love me a guy with personality. Good humor is a must, especially since, let's just face it; I'm a little weird. Charisma, intelligence, creativity, patience, and the ability to go with the flow is a given necessity. If he can make me laugh, let me know everything no matter what will be okay in the end and make me feel special, I'll be a happy girl.

Step Two: Have the will to succeed.

Any man who's going to be in it will have to have his head firmly planted on his shoulders. Wishy-washiness, a lack of effort, or laziness are traits that will not only turn me off but turn me away. That means that the guy in question will take action in life, not sit on his hands.

Step Three: Don't have more issues than me.

Let's just face it. I've known a lot of guys. They always started nice, funny, and cute. Soon enough the moment a relationship starts or shortly there after, they turn into complete freaks. If you're real messed up then seriously, save me and yourself the effort and don't even bother. I'd like to find at least one relatively normal, functional guy at some point in my young life. Seriously, how hard can it be? I'm strange enough, I want the future kids to stand some chance for semi-normalcy.

Now seeing as I just described a male of mythical proportions let's get into the spirit and take the piss out of things.

Step Four: Military men are H-O-T.

Yes, let's go with my favorite kink because I can. Fantasy man would be in the Military. Nothing quite like a well-trained, peak performance male especially in uniform to make me all giggly. I might be a complete homebody, but come on, a girl can so dream that she'll end up with a tasty man in uniform. Plus side is in theory, mister army man would have the discipline, the drive, the delectablness, and won't be completely bonkers.

Step Five: Do things for me.

Fantasy man will do nice things for me because he's nice and likes me to be happy. Small things like a phone call from work, an unexpected kiss, telling me he missed me when he's been away. Stuff like that. Small romantic things. It doesn't take extravagant things to make me feel touched. Just doing that small extra step warms my heart.

Now I know not every guy will be some hot, ripped man laying on a bed of money and slathered in chocolate and have a top end job (not that I wouldn't mind) but a girl can dream though can't she?

Now that's what I'm talking about!

After notes:

Don't take this post too seriously. It's all in good fun.


The Microblogologist said...

Crap I'm never getting anymore niece(s) and/or nephew(s)!

nonna said...

haha micro! i agree. she isn't living in reality world, BUT if she aims really high maybe she will find someone who fits at least a couple of her criteria :)

side's she can always find a sperm donor ;)