Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Biohazard Bratling and Play D'oh

Why is it whenever I get sick the top of my list of disease spreading suspects ends up being Bratling? Probably because kids are just as bad as rats carrying the plague only they're much cuter. I'm a gullible creature by nature. When I hear a kid sniffling I don't quite equate it to them being sick and so when Bratling went to kindergarten and brought back more than just crayon drawings I didn't think anything about it.

More kisses from a snuffly kid? Yes please!

It's not that they just give you diseases. No. It's the fact that kids make it their job to spread their ailments all around that makes them such hazardous creatures to your health. It doesn't help the fact that Bratling is shoving varying things into her mouth lately. Yesterday I got on her case when I caught her chewing on a quarter. It gave "Gra" (that's grandma to the rest of you) a heart attack. As sure as the sun rises if it's something that comes in contact with her hands, it'll end up in her mouth. Bratling touches a gross surface, she then puts her fingertips in her mouth. Little wonder she is always dragging home new diseases. My immune system always ends up getting a workout with her around that's for sure.

I should label the kid with one of these.
bIOhazard Pictures, Images and Photos

Brat has a new favorite thing ever; Play-Doh. Yes, that nasty colored clay in a jar. I'm probably only saying that because Bratling has a love of mooshing the stuff into the carpeting. Not on purpose but it ends up on the floor and under her feet very easily. I'll take a shot in the dark and say that her shoes are coated in the muck right now. On the plus, she'll play with her Play-Doh for hours and hours on end and inevitably it dries up so I can get rid of it. For the price the crap costs that's a good investment. I keep getting handed long snake shaped clay pieces with demands that I transform them into varying animals for Bratling to moosh, cut up, and in general bring to a gory demise. I'm playing with the stuff almost as much as her from that.

The best was last night when we made a headcrab from half-life 2 and then a person. Naturally that quickly turned into a headcrab zombie for the kid to have walk about and enjoy. That's so incredibly cute. I got a gamer at the ripe age of five who's got a good taste in games. It brings tears to my eyes to pass on that torch. God I'm such a bad awesome influence. I don't see many other kindergartners with these do you?
That is so cool.

Extra credit points for those of you who can tell me how to get the crap out of my carpeting.

1 comment:

The Microblogologist said...

Before she started kindergarten she was more of a vector that aided the spread of plagues brought home by Gra and middle sis, though they were very likely to share it even without her help. Now that she is in kindergarten of course she is now a huge source of disease. Sucks to be you!